RHT lecture
boring as usual
half an hour for one slide which contains nothing much!
=.="

3 hours break celebrate jack's birthday
hilarious
but seriously damn paiseh
happy birthday jack!

BCS presentation!
freaking stupid la!
=.="
damn screwed
but who cares it's over!

met meixian cab to sports school!
feels so good to be back there!
feels like home.
i do miss everything there.
saw laoshi, the juniors,mr Pedro, ms jamie, mr mak
and several other people!
=) feels good

ate dinner with piriyah and meixian
good catch up
see you guys on sunday!!=D

dance training tomorrow!
yes dance dance!

it's been awhile since we met on the ride
seeing you today, i don't know how should i feel
you just don't see me, do you.

Today had intHT tutorial only
YAY!
finish at 1pm
go eat do a bit of project stuff
cause of BCS!
GOSH HORRIBLE SUBJECT

then SESSION!
woohoo
let me remember who was there
Diana,Sherman,Junyi,Sean,Nico,Collin,Clarence,Nelson,Harris
Hazrul didn't do much and left.
overall i think it was a pretty good session
cause i think my flow is getting better
need to work on my movements
need to be clean and need variety
feel and groove
woohoo

went to eat with MX after that!
good talk and catching up!
much loves eggy

in between session met norene
cause of some problems
oh well
hope everything is okay
don't take it too hard!=)

late post once again!
not sure if i should session later today!
no one to session with!
Jannson going RP
Diana going Studio Wu
what am i gonna do! LOL

late post once again
by a few minutes
haha!

it was a pretty slack day
starting of with BCS and Econs lecture
damn lost
need to study
next week BCS test OMG

Econs i was lost from the start
so must study
SIAN effing commskills on 8 August
then i have to go for afternoon slot=.="

Stoned from 2 plus to 5
Modern!
Ryan not here today
but still super tiring
Cheryl say my Chaînés improve
but i think still damn 'cui'
modern exam next week
DIE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnygUWpKbuI

this video doesn't allow embedding.
do watch it
it makes me reflect and think about a lot of thing
it's amazing what they have
a lot of times, i do wish it was the same for me.
i feel i do miss out a lot of things from my family.
drifting away slowly.
what keeps us together is simply the house that we all live in.
in the same place yet i feel we're like strangers.
if things weren't like this

blogger is still having problems=.=

monday was a double test day
RHT fail for sure
pretty much just left the whole thing blank without bothering to do it
IntHT i think i can do quite alright, love intHT woohoo

Today,
Happy birthday Emily!
Org beh lecture was sort of interesting but too many examples from newspaper
too draggy
Commskills had presentation!
ZORB Ball!! actually suppose to have a lot of pictures
but CD got Trojan horse. basically a virus=/
and some of slides was gone before presentation
but overall i think it was okay
except that is was really short.
got pretty good comments from classmates
i think i do better without cue cards. haha

ZORB brings loads of memories from New Zealand
sadly when my bro reformat the effing computer it's all gone
SIGH
but memories always remain in my brain and in my heart.
i do miss everything in sports school
it was good seeing noreen, divya and meixian
catching up with them with the ongoing trainings and their studies
cause we're all in TP haha!

tomorrow modern, don't feel like going
sigh.Econs presentation!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY K-LOCK!
you OLDIE 20 already! hahaha!
and for few days ago 24th july
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDISON from FB
=)

TRIED studying in the afternoon
but failed attempt honestly
fell asleep

then about 6 plus plus
dad fetch me and bro, plus andy to k lock's place
at ritz mansion
next to shaw plaza
his house is nice haha

the party was boring at certain point cause i dont know much people
luckily there's mic,daphne and matthew and some other random people i can talk to
jannson came damn late
best part of the party?
when KS tyron jacky and other people start to sabo k lock with durian
haha he was damn paranoid.
hilarious
everyone was laughing like mad
max threw one of the seeds like atomic bomb directly on k lock's head
end up max got pushed into the water
damn hilarious
ronald was saying out loud "wah max you damn fat"
many other funny scenes which has all got to do with durians and k lock
damn retarded.

tomorrow got two tests
havent study
DIE
only a miracle can save you now
pray that i pass my tests

blogger is like effing screwed
there's error on the page
and i can't change the colour and everything
=.="

was a good day
class ended at 1pm
lunch and project till 4.30pm

session at tcc with jannson,yuyao,tiara,zen
not the usual
but it was overall good
they are really nice people=)
learn a lil bit bout' locking
practise choreo
and practise freestyle
battled jannson today
for fun=)
it was good
jannson had variety and he hit the beats
i was repeating sometimes, but my quite good.
these were comments from yuyao at least.LOL
so i need more practise!

i should be sleeping now
RHT lecture tomorrow

just feel it, don't think too much about it. dance with your heart and soul.

BCS and Econs!
go go go.
i can make it.

throw all those crap away
live the way you want
amanda be strong.
you're just having a bad luck, SM.
wtf

just dance with your heart
i remember.
something i must work on, after much thinking
foundation.
im starting all over.
my basics are not strong enough.

thank you auntie for never failing to make me laugh at the end of the day!
can't believe when i was so down, scared you still can make me laugh

"if he do anything just tell me lor"
most comforting words=)
thank you very much for backing me up.
i know i'll make it through

okay finally slept for 9 hours minimum
good
YAY

went to Jas's house to do project
sorry was late
my mum buy me lunch when i said i dont want
so had to eat at home
but i think we are productive today!
so good job everyone!

tomorrow OB presentation=.=
lucky dont need wear formal.
and i think it's quite stupid

nothing much to blog today.
lazy to think about stuff nowadays
although i have a lot to ponder over.

LATE POST: this is for 18 July, Saturday

Dance training in the morning
late again
Stan was late too
haha!
GRR.23 drove slower than i ride bike!
irritating
today's choreo was good
felt good today, i think my groove was back on.

went for lunch after class
jannson,zhian,elijah,diana,alisha and cheryl
Carl's Jnr
OMGOSH cannot finish

went oschool, YAY Jannson went popping
he kept knocking the wall during class? HAHAHA
today's choreo kinda fun
got the scarecrow thing.
after class, almost the whole open class
went to eat western food!
the western food is damn nice! 0.0
shall eat again soon.
went to the MRT with Justin
OMGOSH JUSTIN IM SO SORRY, THE MRT CLOSED ON YOU PLUS MY BAG!
hope you didn't get injured!
stupid MRT, it closed faster than usual
i feel so guilty.

watched Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
it was good, cause for this book is not much action anyway
but more of understanding what is going on exactly.
emotions were good.

im sleepy.need sleep
i want SD new ERA looking cap!!

went for RHT lecture
it was damn bloody boring
slept.
totally didn't listen. haha

did project for the whole afternoon
skipped BCS lecture for project
Org Beh and Commskills
Org Beh was on time
Commskills we submitted two minutes late.
the door slammed at our faces and "put inside the box" was all
saturday sunday commskills teacher don't work
so 50% of our grade is gone
damn it
we ran from engine to business school.
well a lot of people were running since 5pm was submission
we tried.
but i do hope we pass
RHT due monday!
OH GOSH.

tomorrow morning dance training.
yay.
wanted to go rp session
but i finish like damn late
so lazy.

amanda needs to stop being lazy and practise!

when will it be my turn to shine

presentation was okay
scary though
many said it is easy and fun
but not for me, cause im not that outspoke.
hands were shaking.
gosh.
horrible feeling

went for holqa dinner after project that ended at 6pm or something.
so little people once again
xephry came even though he's in zetten.
reach home like 10pm
it was fun even though there was very little people
i miss the noisy holqa

today/yesterday since its a late post.
is all about confidence
luqman asked me if i'm joining Floor The Love(FTL)
at first, i straight away said no
cause i know i'm not good enough
he said train hard and smart and i needed confidence
and he said this:
"confidence will come if you start loving yourself,
love who you are and then you can love what you do better"
actually he told me to try for fun
thought it was nice
this was really a good reflection for me.
thought about it the whole day
and i know if i wanna get better i know i have to overcome my fears.
thank you luqman
although i can't join cause my partner,Alisha thinks its better to join next year.

Talking to Auntie again
it's like a everyday thing now
it feels good to talk to him
cause can say anything i want without thinking what he would think.
is like a complaint channel
was talking about my presentation which lead to talking of dance
he said something about go freestyle on stage then.
i was like no way, you crazy, i so noob, and 'CUI'
i keep emphasizing 'CUI'
he just said practise! also not ask you to perform.
and one thing that sent chills to my bones and touched my heart
"don't think so much, just practise with your heart"
i was like wow.seriously speechless
but thank you

i can feel the oppportunity just right at my finger tips
slipping away.
next year i would be so busy.GOSH
Time management

Later today i've got my first official presentation in TP
Int HT
never been good in public speaking
never been good in presentations
just hope i dont freak out and faint
maintain my cool, stay calm
just need to relax
i just wanna pass this presentation

never ending projects is killing me
screw it
haven't been hip hopping this week
ahhh!

modern was painful
all my past injured areas were cramping and hurting
blame myself for not strengthening them.

i just can't wait for weekends

thank you for keeping me awake and making me laugh
while i'm doing my project


woke up at 7am
late for OB lecture
so tired.
did like project for the 3 hour break
then had commskills
did some impromptu presentation cause we totally forgot about it
but our group did quite okay surprisingly.haha

group meeting after commskills awhile then
print notes at lab plus go bookshop buy paper and files
then went home
the bus bloody crowded.

bukit panjang plaza the whole shopping centre close?
lucky when i went there subway was still open could buy dinner
wonder what happen

did project, trying not to sleep
thanks to klock with good entertainment
i doing project look what he made me do

Kenneth K-Lock
your bro home?

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina.
Yes why?
he's next door hahhaa

Kenneth K-Lock
ooh
ok
eh
ask him if he confirm Going my bd bbq?

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina.
haha you dont have him on msn meh?

Kenneth K-Lock
i lazy
you Go ask leh

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina
WALAO
LATER HE SCOLD ME THEN I SMACK YOU AH

Kenneth K-Lock
ok
haha

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina.
stupid auntie make me do this type of thing
=.="
wait

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina.
he made some weird cat alike and say okay going going
haha
cause he forgot the date

Kenneth K-Lock
LOL
wah lau
you GOt remind him?
haha
quick
ltr he comes this sunday
then die

[AlphaTheta] amanda seraphina. Lol
yes i got remind him la!
haha
see look how funny you ah when you're kan chiong
haha

Kenneth K-Lock
LOL
wth

im tired but i shall blog
suppose to be doing my work
but brain is dead
late post once more

school was normal
session at night
but i think it's a ultimate failure
zen,diana and nic was there

shall i go studio wu at night
for popping and locking
i want, but i only can pick one
cause i got not much money
sigh.
i think locking is oh so funky.
and i think i would enjoy it very much
popping is cool.
haha
hip hop is groovy
and house is damn fun
must must learn these four styles!

org beh lecture, commskills tutorial
kill me
project for org beh and commskills on friday dead line
org beh is screwed cause the teacher keep asking us to play by ear
WTF.

im tired.
ta ta world.

Sunday
went to Jaslyn's house for project
it was good i guess
quite productive
at least we're in the right direction
never waited for almost two hours for people to come
never waited that long in my life
but wasn't angry or anything
cause situation occurs.

congrats Auntie for getting 2nd place
in the dance fusion battle
dope dope!
silly person sound so happy, cause he felt it was unexpected
though i wasn't surprise
Jannson joined too, but wasn't top 16 i think
but good job at least it was a good experience

school later
session or ahhua's class?
amanda your dance is becoming stagnant
especially hip hop
the feel for it is starting to fade
too many external factors to explain
you need a chill pill.
faking a smile is so hard.

had dance in the morning
effing lousy
Wtf was i doing.
control your emotions amanda,
it's affecting every single shit you do.
f*ck it.

am i meant to dance
can i do it.
maybe my bro is right
i shouldn't be dancing.
cause that's what i thought on the way home today.
your hip hop still sucks after one year,amanda.
haven't been progressing.
just quit,will you, can you bear with it?

went to eat lunch with jannson,zen,elijah,clarence and kenneth
funny people.
it was fun.

Jannson accompanied me to popping today
thank you very much
michelle was there too
oschool was kinda empty
enjoyed myself
even though i was scared.
but could get most of the stuff even though i couldn't understand sometimes
can't do the roll thing.
aaron went too, he's super hilarious.
thank you for the nice talk before class!

head back to tp for holqa's sports day.
so much for 30 people
but still had loads of fun
with basketball.
my team won i think
kc,isaac,shawn,zhihao
dope people all can shoot hoops like nobody's business
the only girls was me and suyi
thank you kayla lau mei xian for waiting for me
thank you for accompanying me and hear me talk rubbish
thank you for making me happy
hope your groin is okay
much loves.

don't have a smiley face, cause i don't feel like smiling

the world is full of fake people which is f*cking irritating
this is a bad blog post with bad words

diana and me

RHT was absolutely confusing
BCS was plain boring.
stone for one hour

met divya for awhile she accompanied me to eat
was really great talking to her after not seeing her about a week
well sports school is really safe, tp is not
it's cause you don't know the people in tp at all
they may be your friends, in your clique
but how well do you actually know them
it's really scary
like wolf in sheep skins
and they're so different
they can suddenly treat you non existent all of a sudden
shan't go on.

im glad noreen,divya and meixian are in tp with me
our friendship would go on a long time
we know each other all too well
inside out, bad habits,sleeping habits.
really lucky to have known you guys
we've been through bad times and good times together
all our negative stuff,we have overcome it.
accepted each other in everyway.
and i can tell you guys like really anything.
awesome, love you peeps
study hard!

sessioned with the person in the picture with me,Diana
at TCC today
it was pretty okay
i pretty much practiced like popping hits all the way
damn tiring.
but i learnt one thing today
how to so called move my legs properly for popping
haha.but never practised just understand
thanks diana! and your popping is not lousy!!

can't believe i waited for 960 for like 40 minutes!
GOSH
thank god the bus was empty
cause a off service bus
start servicing at our stop.

hip hop training later.
YAY
but combined class,super a lot of people
BOO.

should i go holqa's sports day?
should i go oschool?

meow
this cat is a happy cat.
living in "auntie's" house. haha
random thought

today didn't have school, well no classes at least
but have to go school for project today
really tired.
almost couldn't get up in the morning and almost missed my stop.

project meeting doesn't seem productive
well it was moderate
we always progress really slow but yet on time
which is scary
today things felt a lil better.
probably cause it's like a break day for me

wanted to rush home and go to oschool
but wanted a good rest i suppose
and i need lots of self control
i need to stop spending so much.
so i keep giving up stuff that i want.
need more discipline.
when circumstances change, i need to change myself too.

when i got home i drop dead on my bed while waiting
for my mum to buy me dinner
sleep feels good
i likey.

tomorrow is a long day
go amanda
then it's saturday, you get to dance!

i finally blog on time.

i like the way things are now
but yet so afraid i'll fall for you
well i doubt i would, just afraid.

listen

what is it with these few days
i just want things to be normal again
maybe i don't fucking care about how people treat me
but sometimes when you have so many things going on
you do have to care.

i can't find a time when i'm not thinking of the problems im facing
besides the time that im sleeping
being awake now is hell, is a nightmare.
i just wanna run away.

things are gonna be like that for a long time
i act like im fine
but everything is not.
i just wanna laugh like im the happiest person on earth
i just want a good laugh, one that actually feels real.

my feet hurts after modern,thanks ryan for the class
the mj song man in the mirror was a wakening call.

thanks auntie once more.

so tired these days
3 days of sleep= 12 hours
i miss my one day 12 hours sleep
screw projects
the only reason i hate school would be cause of effing projects
you suck big time, projects!

can't wait for holidays!
all i can think of is dance and more dance
i still love track i know it
but just too lazy to train
maybe it's a good time for a change
if i had trained for track, if i had went to the national throws coach
i wonder where would i be
would i be at world youth right now.

oh well, life is pretty good now
just screw projects okay. haha

still fretting over what to get auntie
it's difficult to get rich people presents, i swear.
i've been complaining a lot of rubbish to auntie
thank goodness he's not easily pissed off kind
he said he don't mind when i said i'm sorry.
oh well.thank you very much!

another long day i should sleep a little earlier.

Last lesson of APEL today woohoo
RHT im lost, this shows i cannot skip lecture again
IntHT lecture was okay
Org Beh was damn slack, lesson only one hour

went to session at open studio today
super weird
cause alot of seniors
i'm like the only junior
lucky got nic, he's junior but year 3.
thanks martin for the guidance, you're dope yo.
the music being played is nice except at times it's weird
could tell i wasn't going full out but just marking through
a bit 'paiseh'
but oh well.
the feel was good overall, could feel the music and stuff

sadly i got no money couldn't go ahhua's
hope alisha you enjoyed yourself
i know you could have lent me money
but i feel really bad about it.
i shall just keep sessioning.

left school around 9.30pm
reach home like 11
finishing eating dinner at 11.30
bathe at around 11.45pm
super late.

shall go sleep soon i'm tired
i shall session.be hardworking

this is a late post, well it's always a late one
i need money.i'm poor
control desires, i'll pull it through
starve if i have to.

yes i did BCS!!
thanks Eugene for going starbucks with me
good luck for chinese oral! hahaha=)

tomorrow got school
boring!
open studio!
YAY can session!=)
i want to dance

Auntie's party on 26th
must remember
rich kiddo make me so stress
cause i don't know what to buy as a present
at the present moment
i have to be very creative
creative juices please start functioning!
pray Diana can go with me!
please please!

and money please fall from the sky
cause i need it badly!

i want the nike high cut i saw!
ARGH

had TPDE training in the morning
YAY for ah hua! she's dope dope dope,
woohoo!

then session with Diana at TCC
it's must cooling than sports hall whee
YAY she teach me popping, i likey=)
thanks Diana, it's really great to session with you and hang around
and talk about all sorts of stuff!

met Chloe to watch Transformers: revenge of the fallen
the movie was AWESOME
worth $10. super dope.
go Prime haha! i hate you decepticons!
stupid megatron, should just blast your face off.
saw a lot of people today!
like Shahrir and Jared with the other AYG guys!
they are gonna watch transformers too! haha!
saw the soccer seniors from SSP
saw Marissa
saw holqa joleen
saw Welson too.
nice day.
i want the nike high cut!
it's dope
i want $160

later today gotto work on BCS draft
screw BCS you're an irritating subject
hate you.
im tired.

Gina!!


MR SHAHRIR the garfield who got 3rd for 100m=)



today went acer in the morning
waste my trip
if not can sleep longer
turns out my touch pad is fine
just locked it by accident or something

went AYG for track at bishan
reach there in time for shahrir's race
although it wasn't his best,
but still good race and got a medal=)
good job shahrir!
see i went to support you! haha
the winner was some cute small guy from japan
Nashimoto Masaki.

the rest of the races was exciting too
it was really great to see all the juniors again
THANKS GINA FOR THE TICKET=)
and don't worry i won't forget you!
jannah,mariam,aqhari,gail,alicia and ama was there too
great seeing them!

i miss sports school a lot
never regretted going there!
maybe at times i grumble i hated some stuff
but memories there are unique and special
we're like one big family in there
walking to every part of the school feels like im right at home
knowing every single person.
safe and secure
really a home away from home
now that im outta there getting used to life outside of sports school
but it's really hard
there used to be where i hide from all my troubles
where i can get away from problems at home
now i have to face it.
i miss the place i could hide.

tomorrow dance training!
can't wait!
haven't dance the whole week!
thanks auntie for encouragement and stuff
and listen to me whine.

did project in the morning
i doubt it's very productive
but all of us were very dead.
hmmm suppose to watch ayg
but change of plans.

came home manage to catch brother Jared's race on TV
woohoo 5th! good job although it wasn't as good as the heats
but well done, and you did Singapore proud!=)
tomorrow i shall go.yay!

wanted to session but damn lazy.
need to start practising already!
that's what auntie said. haha
been talking to auntie a lot lately!
probably because i'm having bad days and moods lately
talking to auntie is good
feels great, a lot of fun and laughter.
even though he doesnt know that im having a bad day and he always makes my day
his class course starts on sunday!
and i got no money!
thanks=.= always like that.
shall learn soon

AMANDA MUST WORK HARDER FOR DANCE.
everything will get better..
just forget everything and go for it.