When walls are blocking
Monday, August 30, 2010 @ 11:21 PM
i guess there's a lot on my mind
and i don't know how to say it
somehow i feel like i'm going crazy
can hardly think straight
and i have zero confidence in passing any of my papers
I'm worrying about so many things at one go and
so many things in one small little brain of mine:
1) Examinations - i seriously would want to ace them all
2) Track - competition is coming and i just skipped 1 week of training
3) Dance - I would really want to commit for it and recital is well on it's way. However i'm not confident with my abilities and skill levels at all
4) Family - Every moment i'm living in the house, i feel a wall building up inside. Each day i feel that i have lesser things to say and words are just fading away.
So afraid it'll one day just fall apart.
5) Money - "Money makes the world go round" i don't believe it. but somehow it is an important factor. Is money really everything? does it really decide which path we take and how our lives are gonna be? what our future job is? It's such a waste of talents, when all those talented people are the people who are poor. I don't know how everything is gonna work out in the future. I don't know if i would be able to afford to go to a university. I do hope a miracle would appear for those in need.
Sometimes you can feel so lonely inside, but yet be so busy out there.
This feeling really just makes your heart ache.
But it doesn't kill you, so just hope it makes you stronger.
I don't fear loneliness, because maybe i'm getting used to it
I don't know if i would be lonely the rest of my life
I don't know if i would every find someone.
but life goes on, i just gotta live with it.
The only thing i fear and hate is people not listening.
I can talk and sometimes people around just don't hear me.
I don't know why, but it makes me feel scared everytime it happens
So afraid that no one can hear me at all.
When i'm screaming and shouting my lungs out and no one hears me
It feels like i don't exist at all.
When can someone finally see me?
up up and away
Sunday, August 29, 2010 @ 11:31 PM
(:
Sho Matsubara; i'm a Japan fan. sorry!YOG ended last week
as much as i think Singapore is trying too hard
and well the spirit of sports somehow isn't entirely seen.
But i guess YOG wasn't so bad afterall
really admire all the young sporting talents all over the world
it's really amazing what they can do and i hope people see that
this includes local athletes
even though Singapore didn't get much medal, everyone did a great job(:
it's something new and Singapore isn't there for sports yet
probably we'll get there someday, just not yet
yes, the international athletes are hot, i know
but this isn't the reason why they're here
so get over it.
i hope this kinda thing comes to Singapore again
and we get to see world-class athletes once more.
as much as i think Singapore is trying too hard
and well the spirit of sports somehow isn't entirely seen.
But i guess YOG wasn't so bad afterall
really admire all the young sporting talents all over the world
it's really amazing what they can do and i hope people see that
this includes local athletes
even though Singapore didn't get much medal, everyone did a great job(:
it's something new and Singapore isn't there for sports yet
probably we'll get there someday, just not yet
yes, the international athletes are hot, i know
but this isn't the reason why they're here
so get over it.
i hope this kinda thing comes to Singapore again
and we get to see world-class athletes once more.
1k05!
Frolicks the way i like it
Friday night has TAS Appreciation Night
Wasn't Great, but it wasn't bad either
eating, performances and dance off in my case
got sabotage to dance off
shorts and barefooted (after taking off my slippers)
this isn't the ideal condition to dance in
nevertheless i survived, and tried to run away
After the whole thing, went to the cathay for Frolicks!
yummy!
wanted to play pool but too expensive; $11/hr
wanted to kbox; $27 or $37/ hr - INSANE
end up the rest watched movie while i take my bus home
Saw a cute guy in NUM :D
Mac and Cheese, Bake Rice and my Quater Chicken(:
Saturday i watched Berlin 36 with Chloe
it's a pretty awesome movie
i really liked it.
Documentary style
and the movie didn't fall below my expectations at all
Really learnt the truth behind the story
really how much we can learn from history
The racism and discrimination against the Jews
were seriously overboard
i wonder how can one person's idealogy get so extreme,
that it can brainwash almost everyone's mind in the country
learnt about courage, determination and friendship
Had Kenny Rogers after that , at Suntec
Yummy!
sometimes i wish people could listen and hear me
sigh
sleepless
Tuesday, August 17, 2010 @ 11:15 PM
23 hours without sleep
only slept two hours in the afternoon
and i'm still alive.
Barely.
Chalet at Costa Sand Pasir Ris
didn't sleep
played mahjong and talk crap all the way the time i'm suppose to leave
which is 7AM
The sky was amazing when i walking out
the photo is above(:
toko 354 and then the mrt to Bishan to meet D and MX
apparently both late and i was half dead at MacD
Went to Bishan Stadium after all the waiting
great to see the juniors and all the other people.
miss them a lot!
Athletes were amazing
at their age they're doing timings surpassing everyone a few years older
It's crazy but good.
Good job to Team Singapore and Good luck!
same goes to all other countries.
The thing i was really amaze by was all their techniques
it's really too good.
other sports were good too
i watched it on TV though
not live.
I really like gymnastics
i think they're crazy.
seriously dope.
Swimming is like similar to track
so it's good to watch too(:
Initially i'm not enthusiastic about the whole YOG
tht's why i decided not to volunteer for it.
I think i made th right choice anyway
because volunteering means i would miss out all the action
i prefer being a spectator
so it's all good.
The good part about YOG to me is just that
finally we get to watch sports and this kinda level
With many international people.
Since i do not have a sports channel
HAHAHHA. and of course all the interaction and learning
If i was volunteering, i probably be working my arse off.
So Thank God i made the right choice.
The only annoying part is that the some people
volunteerto see 'hot' people
WTF.
so annoying.
don't know anything about sports then why the hell are you there?
Sunday, August 15, 2010 @ 11:10 PM
it was funny
everyone should watch the movie
it's wayyy better than Avatar: The Last Airbender
went for nephew's birthday
a newborn.
hope you grow up and be a good man(:
watched YOG on TV
and Singapore is going no where.
tomorrow is gonna be pretty crazy
Thursday, August 12, 2010 @ 10:04 PM
In life, we probably would never get what we want.but we always have to make things work somehow. So we just got to make the best out of it.
It wasn't the best chalet i could ask for, but i had fun.
XBOX!! DEAD OR ALIVE!!
The chalet was scary, but there were people to keep that thought away.
Avatar: The Last Airbender wasn't the best movie, it wasn't awesome at all. but it entertained me for a few hours and helped kill time.
Sometimes i wish that some moments could be stop, rewind or replay. If only i held on to you and not push you away. Wonder how things would have went
Last day at TAS
Saturday, August 7, 2010 @ 1:43 AM
but i bother to blog
probably because it's a day i should remember
it's the last day at TAS
Tourism Academy Sentosa.
I remember i hated it from the first day
but it took me awhile to realise that it wasn't that bad
i kinda like it after awhile
only when it was the last week of school,
then i realise i'm gonna miss the pretty views and
the comfy chairs in lectures.
Happy Birthday Edmund!
Our class sucks, never celebrate for you!
but anyway it was a nice lunch with you, Tim and Ling Na!
Hope we get a chance to do it again!
After the two tiring tutorials and Intro Lei & Rec revision lecture
took some photos and went to Siloso beach to find 1K05
i swear it was hell walking from beach station to the other end.
Long..
had fun playing.
Except for the fact that i bang into a flower pot while trying to catch a frisbee
now my leg has a bruise and swelled up part. on the shin! -.-
anyway, afterhat went chomp chomp!
my first time! and the food was AWESOME
yummy!
then we went to Lester's house
his house is so pretty and comfy!
His dog, Yellow is so fluffy i'm gonna die!
played monopoly deal and went home soon after!
got home around 1250AM!
Update soon!
Happy Birthday YY/ Bro!:D
listen
Tuesday, August 3, 2010 @ 11:58 PM
that's all for school.
thank goodness i got a B for coursework grade
i barely made it, thanks to the test which i just pass.
but in actual fact i was suppose to fail.
After school, went Sexy Diamond to kill time
Thanks Ben/ Wei Keat for th Avatar series!:D
Thanks Elke for showing me cool videos!
thanks for helping me kill time!
House course!
it's awesome of course
but tiring! i could hardly breathe today!
recap all the techniques plus new ones
Thanks Daniel for yet another awesome clas
When to eat with Marcus and Jinwen
but Jinwen didn't really eat lol
so after that i went home.
I spammed the TAS printer for notes. LOL
What shall i do tomorrow.
despicable me
Monday, August 2, 2010 @ 11:42 PM
got this from google
It's a Monday, so it's Accounting Day
Accounting revision lecture
which i slept through most of it.
Then had Subway with Fiona and Reynold
back to school for Accounting Tutorial
It wasn't as bad as i thought it would be.
The bad news was only my accounting test 2
23/40. HAH
lucky i pass. phew
Need to study harder!
After that met Chloe for movie
watched Despicable Me!
sorry i know, a bit slow.
been busy with projects
but anyway i still get to watch right.
it's a very good move, ultra funny
i love edith! haha! she's so cute.
that's all folks